Tonight I finished reading Sacred Suffering cover to cover. There is so much to take in. I was left with the words of Diane.
Her story gives much glory to God and his presence in our lives, but one little sentence on page one seventy five really struck me. She says “for the moment I was okay. And maybe that’s enough.
I have been sitting here taking inventory. It dawned on me that after living in my father’s home for four years I just recently have been at peace about it. Brian and I have a little TV room/converted bedroom where we hang out. I resisted doing anything to make it my own.
My favorite chair has been in storage, I thought it was too big for the room. My sister finally went and got it. It’s one of those chair and half’s that embrace you. Its name is Chairy. I feel like I have been reunited with an old friend.
A lot of living goes on in this tiny room. Next to me is Brian’s chair and a hospital tray with everything he needs for the day. It is quite untidy; I bus it regularly and try to ignore it. Also he has books and bibles stacked up along the wall. Our oversized antique desk holds the television. Behind me is a huge wall mirror that has been with me since my bedroom where I grew up.
But best of all to my left is a wall of boy toys and a well used kids table and chairs. This assures me that the most loveable little boys on earth will be coming soon, my grandsons of course.
I have many storms brewing on the horizon but tonight I am okay, and maybe that’s enough.
Adrian’s chapter in Sacred Suffering tells of her husband, Brian’s stroke and how God has helped her through all the painful changes of losing their home and business. Be sure to check out her honest and inspiring blog, Crying and Laughing.
2 opinions on “Enough for Now?”
Thank you for your wonderful post Adrian! I’ve been a fan of yours for a long time and have been moved, blessed, and encouraged by the chapter you wrote for Sacred Suffering as well as by what you write on your blog. Thank God for the gift he has given you to communicate so honestly and winsomely, what your life journey has been. You have a way of making me laugh and cry, always coming away with a greater sense of hope, and of being cared for by a Father I can trust. Thank you Adrian, for not hiding the talent He gave you, but sharing it with us! I am blessed!
Great post, Adrian! I was moved by Diane’s comment, “Enough for Now?” as well when I read her story. It reminded me of the time I asked the Lord, “When is enough ENOUGH?!” I had recovered from being a paraplegic and received back the use of my legs and arms, but I was facing continual surgeries. First, was the neck surgery. This was a welcomed surgery since it’s purpose was to fuse my neck bones to keep my neck sturdy and in place so my spinal cord would not be pinched again. Next came the emergency gallbladder surgery. My ability to feel pain had been greatly compromised through the paralysis of my body, so I had not been aware that my gallbladder was bad until it exploded spreading poison throughout my entire system. I was not prepared for this surgery and had had quite enough of hospitals and physical pain – having already spent almost a year in and out of the hospital and rehabilitation. But then came the total hysterectomy. Much like the gallbladder scenario, my body was reacting to the stress it had been under from the trauma I had experienced from the car accident that had left me a paraplegic. I was told this was not uncommon, but that didn’t make the difficulty of having to go “under the knife” one more time any easier. This time, when I came out of the hospital to recover, I had asked the Lord, “When is enough, ENOUGH?” And I heard Him reply with a statement in my head, just as if He had right into my ear, “When you rest in My REST and when I say, ‘REST’!” What an eye-opener this was to me. I had thought God’s pleasure was in my “doing for Him” – doing what He had called me to do. Not in “resting”. This was counter-intuitive to me. But, I got the picture. I asked Him to show me how to REST when every fiber in my being wanted to be up and around being active. And I asked Him to show me how to REST when I was up and around, being active, so that my body was energized by His power and not my own.